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On Children’s Day, let’s talk about how kids affect romance between partners

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A marriage is a lifetime commitment to making things work with another person. How does this change when kids come into the picture?
What happens when kids come into a relationship [Credit: Pixay]

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What happens when kids come into a relationship [Credit: Pixay]

Just as you change your approach to many things when you move from single to dating and from that stage to the married stage, something also changes in that relationship between you and your partner when you have kids… or when you actually don’t.
Kids impact your relationship one way or another – either due to their birth, or even for an inability to birth yours when you really want to.
Kids impact your relationship one way or another. Whether you have them or not.  [Credit: kate sept2004 /Getty]

Kids impact your relationship one way or another. Whether you have them or not. [Credit: kate sept2004 /Getty]

Not having kids affect relationships badly
All over the world, an overwhelming number of people want to have kids, to procreate and leave an offspring that carries their genes and carries on the family name and legacy. That desire is even more pronounced on this part of the map where getting kids, and many times more than one, is the ideal.

So people go into marriages expecting to bear kids. The whole of the wedding ceremony would even show the expectations, and just how much premium friends and family and even the couple place on getting kids.
To have that level of expectation and see it not materialize will eventually see the positivity in the marriage fade. In its place comes worry, concern, frantic attempts and less and less of romance.
One of the most stressful periods for a marriage is during the wait for kids [Credit - Shutterstock]

One of the most stressful periods for a marriage is during the wait for kids [Credit – Shutterstock]

Even the best, most intimate and most loving couples would have their relationship strained with a lack of kids looming in the back of their minds. With expectations for kids reaching a frenzy, the thought never goes away, even when it’s not being talked about. Even when couples stay together and intentionally keep their eyes on remaining in love and weathering everything together, with an unmet desire for kids constantly at the back of their minds, romance can’t particularly flourish and it’ll tell on their relationship – positively in that it could bring them closer more than ever or drive them farther from each other emotionally.
Having kids has its own effects, too
One of the commonest things that happens to a couple’s relationship once they get kids is that their attention changes from being lovers to being parents. And while this cannot be condemned in any way, we till need to mention that couples are first lovers before parents. One does not need to be neglected in order for the other to flourish.
It’s difficult to achieve many times, being a mom and dad has to be balanced with being lovers. Romance has to stay alive, while supervision and involvement in the upbringing of the kids can’t suffer, too.
It’s usually a lot to handle, really. Sex suffers because you are too busy watching and fawning over the kids who have special sleep schedules that see them bouncing all night when mum and dad want to sleep. Date nights are not even as straightforward as they used to be, because you have an infant to lug around and worry about half the time you are on the date. It’s not easy to feel sexy when you have a baby on your hip half the time, when both partners are sleep-deprived struggling to stay awake.
Parenting is a 24-hour job that only gets better with time. And there is also a tendency for women to over-prioritize bonding with kids over staying bonded with their spouses.
Many mothers believe the rewards of watching their children grow up is worth the cost to their romantic relationships, but it really does not have to be that way.
Who says you can’t have both?

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Mr Eazi proposes to Temi Otedola!

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For what seemed like a long while, celebrity power couple—Mr Eazi and Temi Otedola—are finally engaged as Oluwatosin Ajibade better known as Mr Eazi pops the heartwarming “Will you be my wife?” question to his girlfriend of 2 years Temiloluwa Otedola and she responded favourably in the affirmative “Yes” tone.

Fashion mogul and Icon Temi Otedola began dating artiste and music label CEO Mr Eazi in the year 2020 and have been living together ever since in their London apartment, sharing intimate moments, even meeting respective family members. This they’ve both shared in detail on their How Far? With Mr Eazi And Temi Otedola podcast.

Temi announced her engagement by posting the sea-side proposal of Mr Eazi on one knee asking the important question. The video goes by the simple caption of the infinity logo connoting they’re both locked in for life.

Congratulations to Temi Otedola and Mr Eazi!

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Nicki Minaj agrees “Essence” should be song of the year at the Grammys

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American superstar rapper, Nicki Minaj, shares the same sentiments as myriads of Wizkid fans and well-wishers worldwide, in that she concurs to the argument the trendsetting crossover record-breaking single from Wizkid’s 2020 released “Made In Lagos” album, Essence should be in the conversation for the coveted “Record of the Year” plaque at this year’s Grammy Awards.

Although “Essence” did not receive the much desired nomination in the category for “Record of the Year” at the 2022 Grammy Awards, it did get a nod for Best Global Music Performance, the first of its kind.

Irrespective of the snub, Nicki whilie on Joe Budden TV (YouTube) as a guest on the special episode tagged A Conversation With Nicki Minaj & Joe Budden agreed with the host (Joe Budden) when he said “We need people on the Grammy board that know that “Essence” was song of the year” with an exclamatory “Right! Right!” response. She even proffered, “We should have our own Grammy Board“, in support of many and the popular believe that Black Americans or black artistes in general are always stereotyped to a particular category at the award show, if indeed they made it to the top categories, they barely win; Nicki Minaj does not have a Grammy Award herself and that is still a shock to many, especially when considering her refined catalogue of music.

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Pheelz & Buju (BNXN) live the carefree lifestyle on “Finesse”

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After much teasing, the anticipated Finesse by Pheelz and Buju (now BNXN) hit DSPs across the globe and just like the teaser gave off, Finesse is a banger! It is produced by young producer under Pheelz’s wing known as Miichkel.

On Finesse, Pheelz and Buju live their life to the fullest, the carefree lifestyle is what they desire and they are determined to stay on that track for the time being. “I’ve been living the fast life but I see it in slow mo / And you see my lifestyle, I got Gs in the turbo / . . . / Bad girl sey she want Netflix & Chill / So I ja ticket give her warning / If you fall in love, girls it’s certain / You go chop breakfast, I’m not capping“, Pheelz explains on the first verse, even saying love and relationship cannot stop him from living the ‘ballers’ lifestyle; “I’d be dammed if there’s anybody that could be like me / I be like Mo’ Salah, coming up the right wing / I cut through your defender, you no need to tell me / I must finesse / And you know sey me I must net“, Buju braggingly adds on the second verse, saying he can score any chick that catches his eye and dish her the next minute.

listen to the popular joyous chorus “Ah finesse / If I broke na my business / Ama shana e go bright o / Folake for the nighr ohere or on Apple Music.:

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